LADY GAGA – TELEPHONE
(INTERSCOPE)
It is without doubt
that the world is a better place for having Lady Gaga in it than it would be
without her. Within her little minx
exterior appears to be a truly troubled space cadet, partially playing the game
and partially thinking that it is all real.
Of course the fact
that I even know more than five Lady Gaga songs is truly wrong and borderline
weird. This is not my music; I should
not be coming or going here/there.
Everything about her is phoney.
She’s a fraud. Its not about the
music, it’s about the costumes, the persona, the act. It’s theatre, its pop music, not high art.
“Telephone” is the big
Lady Gaga song with the Beyonce guest appearance. Beyonce is a better singer than Lady Gaga. She is also sexier, produces better songs,
is probably younger and is definitely female.
When she drops into the track she also drops a huge dollop of class onto
proceedings that helps us turn a blind eye and deaf ear to the weird effects
the studio have inserted into the piece with all the subtly of a sledgehammer.
It feels stupid to
pretend that I am reviewing this song from the picture disc seven inch. Who the hell am I kidding? It is from the music video set in a prison
that was launched with much hype and even more disappointment. Within it there are lesbian overtones and a
non to Kill Bill but beyond that not quite enough to paper over the
cracks. Still, people lap this up as
art and who am I to belittle other people’s tastes. Lady Gaga is just a force of nature you can only embrace and hope
she does not ruin too many brain cells in the process. Regardless of the weirdness and dress up
this is not up there with Madonna in her prime.
Why I bought this
record I do not know. This is not my
era and this is not my chosen style of music to listen to. Occasionally you can masturbate to her pop
videos, just not this one.
Thesaurus moment:
ersatz.
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