Monday 23 March 2009

THE NOISETTES – DON’T UPSET THE RHYTHM (VERTIGO)


THE NOISETTES – DON’T UPSET THE RHYTHM (VERTIGO)

I feel foolish and duped for purchasing this record. For some crazy reason I thought this band was going to be something else but as soon as the needle hits the admittedly impressive vinyl the penny drops and it is just the latest form of indie disco shambles and mess. This feels like such an Uncle Tom kind of record.

Currently appearing in a Mazda advert ripping off a White Stripes video (“Seven Nation Army”), absolutely everything about this song/single stinks of making money and running. The crude sexual overtones are hardly subtle and these echo the whirring sentiments and message of the dirty slag that is this song.

At the end of the day it all sounds like being at some horrible fun park that was torn apart by Hurricane Katrina and now the government wants no part of this embarrassing reality so in the words of the singer its “DIY to paradise” (or something).

There is an argument to say that this song is infectious but so also is swine flu and if this record sounds new and fresh to you you obviously were not around in the eighties, more you were a putrid piece of jizz dribbling out of your father’s cock and reluctantly crawling into your mother’s cunt into a womb that was just as uninterested and unwelcoming. In fact anyone that likes this song/single, you were a mistake and should have been an abortion were it not for the fact that clinic charges too much.

Why is there such a vacant fucking look in these people’s eyes? This is a bad record.

Thesaurus moment: before.

The Noisettes
Vertigo

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